The Ongoing Crisis

So fresh, so clean

You know you’re an adult in 2023 when you’ve been getting in your ten thousand steps a day.

But you know you’re truly an adult in 2023 when you achieve these steps via vigorous house cleaning (with neatly folded microfibre cloths and your favourite toy – the steam mop).

This is what happened to me when my friend, who I met at uni ten years before, came to stay for the weekend and I tidied up ahead of her arrival.

*A moment’s silence for ten years passing since uni. TEN YEARS. My main achievement since graduating has been the ability to break the printer in every company I’ve ever worked for*

Once upon a time, the house-share my friend and I lived in was decorated with pizza leaflets. We wouldn’t get up until midday. We lived on a diet of garlic bread.

Not now. No. Now, I’m in my 30s. I eat organic fruit. I drink wine and go to bed at 9pm. Sometimes, in an act of rebellion, I’ll put the bins out in the morning when I hear the van…rather than the night before. Rock and roll.

It had been a while since I’d seen my friend. I had to pre-warn her during the car journey from the airport that I’d been adulting pretty hard since our uni days and was now (dramatic pause) responsible.

It was a tough pill to swallow (paracetemol in preparation for the Prosecco we were about to drink). We pulled up outside and looked on in horror. “This is your f******g house?” she said.

“I know!” I replied, tears welling up. “I have a subscription to the modern milkman …”, then came the real terror, “….and an AIR FRYER”.

Her gasps could he heard around the quaint village I now reside in.

It was business as usual the moment we brought in her suitcases. We raided the cocktail cabinet, chatted all night, embarrassed ourselves in bars in the city, ate more chocolate than was good for us and took so many terrible selfies that Gen Z’s were cringing for us.

Here’s to long-lasting friendships; the ones where it doesn’t matter how long it’s been since you’ve seen each other, you’ll laugh like children until wine comes out of your nose.


7 thoughts on “So fresh, so clean

  1. Fresh and Clean is brilliant, it is so real it must have happened! I also wanted to say thank you for liking my blog Pets… it is important when another blogger upticks one of my blogs I appreciate that big time, as I also know what it is like to just stare at the screen hoping divine intervention happens. So, a big thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Where do you find this stuff, and how do you articulate the freedom and imprisonment of adulthood so well?! : ) I tip my hat (rather the frizzy head of hair that is this ol’ scrub woman’s) Hth did I get here? Where is the girl I once knew who would decide not to go to school and submit to rule in a spur of the moment decision while donning Testament and Metallica shirts because they weren’t loved & understood by the masses?! Now I wash dishes in the evening for the pleasure of seeing a clean kitchen for half of the following day & generally not do what I wish for myself or others?! Where’s the rebellious spirit when it may do real good?

    Liked by 1 person

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